Enlisting Bugs To The War On Terror

First it was dolphins and sea lions protecting the United States, now it's bugs.

The Pentagon and its Defence Advanced Research Projects Agency (DARPA), as well as several other companies, are planning to employ the help of bees, fish and cockroaches to sniff out chemical toxins and biohazards in buildings and subways, to decrease the risk to humans doing the same job. This is because nature's sensors and tools are more finely tuned than anything humans have engineered. I wonder what kind of work benefits there bugs will get? Oh, and the next time you step on a cockroach in the subways, you might be killing an employee of the Department of Homeland Security.

Source:
Bugging Out on Homeland Security - Popular Science
http://www.popsci.com/popsci/technology/243434a70e131110vgnvcm1000004eecbccdrcrd.html

Let's File It Under "Oops"; FBI Misplaces Laptops

Several days ago it was reported that the FBI had lost 160 laptops in the last four years, some 51 of them containing sensitive information. Before that, the FBI had misplaced over 300 laptops in a space of just over a few years. Every newspaper article in print and online that I've come across this story in (and that's not too many), not a single one mentions any kind of punishments for those responsible for the losses or thefts. Better yet, the situations where the agents have lost these laptops as well as weapons are in a few cases ridiculous; unlocked cars, leaving them behind at restaurants, grocery stores, restrooms, etc... With reports of identity thefts in the news frequently due to mishandling of laptops, data, or just plain human stupidity, I haven't heard of any punishments for those responsible. It's always either an announcement of the fact that they've been lost, with little or no information or apology, or in some cases just a simple "oops, we were stupid. Sorry, we'll try not to do it again" statement.

In England, on the other hand, The Nationwide Building Society was fined £980,000 (€1,464,000/$1,922,000) for the theft of ONE laptop from an employee's house, a laptop which contained banking information from some 11 million of the corporation's clients. Now how many people have the FBI and other institutions, universities and corporations compromised due to their "mishaps"? The BBC article mentions that it is not known whether Nationwide fined, fired or disciplined the employee in question or not, but one would think the company might wanna do that, considering the cost of the ordeal to the company, in terms of money and image. Guess the FBI didn't feel the need to, seeing as people's view of the bureau is already tarnished, and it's just another instance of a big OOPS!

[Note: The BBC website has some pretty good information to turn to in case of Identity Theft. CNN, not so much...]

Sources:
FBI loses laptops with classified information - CNN.com ( http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/02/12/fbi.laptops/index.html )
FBI still losing laptops, weapons - Homeland Stupidity ( http://www.homelandstupidity.us/2007/02/13/fbi-still-losing-laptops-weapons/ )
BBC NEWS Business Nationwide fined for stolen laptop ( http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/business/6360715.stm )

Town Asks For Firetruck, Gets $665,962 Homeland Security Grant; Not Allowed To Buy Firetruck

Here's a lovely example of idiotic budgeting, decision making, and bureaucracy. With billions going into Homeland Security spending each year in America, why exactly can't the money be put to good use throughout the system, instead of throwing it to communities in ridiculous quantaties, whilst stipulating what they can and cannot use the moeny for? Here's a perfect example of money thrown into the wrong jar:

The fire departmentof Cheshire, Massachusetts, needed a new fire truck, and turned to the government to lend a hand, and ended up getting a lot more than what they expected: a $665,962 homeland security grant. That amount is 26 times the annual budget of the volunteer fire department in the town of 3,500. And here's the best part: Under the terms of the grant, the department is not allowed to spend it on a fire truck.

So, instead of getting a bit of money to buy a new firetruck or refurbish an old one, the town of Cheshire won a grant to fortify the ranks of its volunteer brigade. I guess one can see this from the bureacraut's point of view: more men equals more carriers of water. No need for a truck, especially as it's a small town and all...

But wait a minute, how does a small town in Massachusetts receive such a sizable amount of money out of the budget of the Department of Homeland Security (DHS)? Their website, (www.dhs.gov) gives little answer to the question.

Maybe the Department of Homeland Security can better explain why. A spokeswoman for the DHS said that the money comes from the Staffing for Adequate Fire and Emergency Response grants, a program that was absorbed into the DHS after the agency was established follow Sept. 11th. The spokeswoman said that the town "presented a multifaceted project proposal", and that the grant could be spent over four years. How it will be spent, there was no elaboration. Except, that they can't buy the truck firetruck.

The Cheshire Fire Department wrote two grant requests, one for the $175,000 fire truck and the other for upping the ranks of its 29-member volunteer force. Still, $665,962 sounds a little too much. And, wasn't this supposed to be about National Security? The town does have the Cheshire Cheese Monument, a sizable concrete sculpture of a cheese press commemorating a 1,450-pound cheese hunk given by town elders to Thomas Jefferson in 1801. But I doubt anyone has yet studied its value as a terrorist target yet, or is there something we don't know?

And why exactly is more and more money going into the mainland and small towns, whilst the towns which might need it, such as Boston, New York, and Washington. These cities complained last year that their homeland security grants were lowered, whilst the small town got more than they bargained for. Cheshire, the smallest town in Massachusetts to get a grant (it also ranks 266th in the state in terms of population), but received the largest grant in Massachusetts. And the story continues all around the country...

The money will now be put to use to hire more volunteer fire fighters, especially from amongst high schoolers, and to reimburse the volunteers lost wages whilst on duty. The town council is to meet to decide just where the money will end up. Still, even with all that excess money and possibilities, there are still pressing matters in Cheshire, according to the firechief;

"We really needed the truck."

Sources:
Homeland Security spending: idiotic pork - Boing Boing
Firefighters' windfall comes with a catch - The Boston Globe
U.S. Department of Homeland Security | Assistance to Firefighters Grant Program |